I Was Mistaken

I used to believe I was incompetent, unorganized, not intelligent, unable to make it in the real world. I was mistaken.

I used to believe that no one saw me, that I would always be misunderstood, that I would never matter. I was mistaken.

I used to think I was alone, that I would always feel alone. I was mistaken.

I used to think I was better than other people. I was mistaken.

I used to think I was worse than everyone else. I was mistaken.

I used to think things were intentionally hard for me, like good things couldn’t happen to me if I wanted them. I was mistaken.

I used to think I disliked yard work. I was mistaken.

I used to think I was awkward and annoying to my people. I was mistaken.

I used to think I couldn’t handle responsibilities, that I didn’t have the gumption to get things done, take care of myself, take care of others. I was mistaken.

I used to think that what I had to offer was worthless and was not valued by others. I was mistaken.

I used to think I was not worth valuing. That what I have to offer and who I am. I was mistaken.

I used to think I didn’t care about beauty and impractical things. I was mistaken.

I used to think that I didn’t care about comfort. I was mistaken.

I used to think that my body was in the way of me experiencing life. I was mistaken.

I used to think that being in a body and being human was getting in the way of life. I was mistaken.

I used to think I wasn’t kind, or that I wasn’t mean.

I was mistaken

I am all things.

Let us, in this next season, allow ourselves to be all of who we are, and let that be enough.

More beauty, more joy, more play, because that is why we are here, to partake in the full experience of being human.

Every little gift that comes my way deserves to be celebrated.

I am luminous, I am vibrant. I am a gift and I also give.

I am a part of this world, of this living, this loving, this being, this healing.

Life happens in our bodies. If I want the full experience life, I need to include my body.

The feeling of breath in my lungs, the feel of a stretch, the flavor of food and drink. The weight of a hug.

I used to think that I wasn’t human because I wasn't allowed to be. Being human was gross and sinful and deadly. ( I was mistaken)

I have slowly come back into the deep embodied reality that being human is in fact, the greatest gift. Without it, none of this is possible. It is not something to avoid, but to celebrate. Fuck all the capitalistic and patriarchal ideals that have taught us otherwise.

I come back now to an idea I have been walking with for years now: what if I chose this?

What if I chose to come here, knowing all the risks that came with it. What if I chose it because I believed in the magic of it all, in the beauty, the power of humanity.

The healing is actually at the very start: believing in our enoughness. That root is what will yield the healing we need.

I thought I was bad. I was mistaken.

I thought I wasn’t enough. I was mistaken.

We have been mistaken. (and there is nothing more liberating than this realization.)

What if in just these two reality shifts we can allow the healing we need to unfold?

If you're interested in working with me and having more conversations about this you can

I Was Mistaken

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